Inside
by GlassRose77
Summary: Jack wakes up in a hospital where Nurse Sato and Doctor Harper are looking after him after a bad fever. The gorgeous receptionist seems to recognize him, but why doesn't Jack know who he is? And why is everyone saying hateful things to Jack?
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: Several reviewers mentioned that this story was a bit confusing, so I've edited this chapter. Hopefully it's more readable now. I hope to post another chapter by tonight, but after that, I'm on vacation for a week, so I can't promise more for a bit.**

**Also, standard disclaimer: I own no rights to any of these characters, no matter how much I adore them.  
**

* * *

"He's waking up!" An excited Welsh voice. A woman.

"Quiet, now, don't frighten him. He may not know where he is." Quiet, English accent. Another woman.

The voices echoed strangely in Jack's head.

"Doctor, the patient is waking." The English woman again.

He opened his eyes slowly, but the light in the room was too bright and he squinted. His mind felt foggy.

"I see you're with us again, Mr. Harkness." A new voice, this time a man's. English too. It seemed, at this point, sensible to assume he was in the United Kingdom.

As his eyes got used to the light, Jack saw three people standing around him. There was a Japanese woman with black hair and light brown skin, a white woman with dark hair and freckles, and a short white man. Both the man and Japanese woman were wearing scrubs.

"Where—" He stopped. His throat was dry, and his voice was rusty.

The nurse handed him a glass of water. "Do you need help sitting up?" she asked.

Jack thought for a moment before nodding. He felt terribly weak. The nurse used a remote to angle the hospital bed up. He drank a sip of water. "Where am I?" His voice was still raspy, but at least his tongue wasn't stuck to the roof of his mouth.

The doctor answered. "You're in Whitchurch Hospital. You've had a terrible fever. You may not remember coming here."

A hospital. That would make sense, given the obnoxious fluorescent lighting and hideous beige walls. Jack shook his head at the doctor's words. "I don't." He couldn't even remember the last place he had been, and he certainly did not recall coming to the hospital. He paused for a moment, thinking. "I'm in England?"

"Good God, he's lost it," the Welsh woman said, surprised.

"You're in Wales. Cardiff." The doctor looked slightly amused as he added, "You live here."

Jack nodded slowly and looked up at the three of them. "And…do I know any of you?"

The freckled woman gasped. "You're not serious?"

"I…um…I'm sorry?"

"Jack, it's me. Your flatmate." When he did not respond, she continued. "Gwen Cooper? My husband Rhys Williams and I live with you, you nut."

"Gwen, you'll have to be patient. With a fever like he had, he may have temporary amnesia." The nurse smiled at Jack. "I'm Toshiko Sato, your nurse. You can call me Nurse Sato, or Tosh, whatever you like. This is Doctor Owen Harper. He's been keeping an eye on you."

"Yes," Harper jumped in. "Right, and I'd like to keep you here for a few more days to make sure you're okay. Nurse Sato here will take care of you. You'll have a session, perhaps several, with a psychiatrist, make sure you know who you are and all. Right now, however—"

"I know who I am." Jack cut Dr. Harper off. "I haven't forgotten that."

"Could you tell us, then, dear?" Tosh asked.

"I'm Jack Harkness. I…I live…in Cardiff. No, I remember that now. I live in Cardiff and I work at…a boatyard. In Penarth. I'm a rigger. I moved here from America. I'm…tall and good looking." He grinned.

"Who was your last boyfriend?" asked Gwen.

Jack hesitated for a moment. "Christopher. 'Til he dumped me and left. See, I remember. I remember you, too. I—" A sudden wave of dizziness came over him, and he leaned back into the bed. "And Rhys. And…and…."

"And?" asked Dr. Harper.

"And…I don't know. It's like I'm missing something but I don't know what. I don't even know in relation to what."

"Don't strain yourself today. You had quite the battle with that fever. But don't worry, Mr. Harkness. We'll make sure both your mental and physical health are in good condition when we let you go." Harper half smiled at Jack. "I will be back later. In the meantime, rest, eat, hydrate, and Toshiko will take care of you. Tosh, one hour for his visitor."

"Yes, Doctor."

Owen Harper left the hospital room.

Tosh turned to Gwen. "As he said, Ms. Cooper, one hour. I'm sorry, but I can't give you privacy. I've got to monitor his condition for a few hours."

"That's all right, really," Gwen replied. "Jack, love, how are you feeling?"

"Great." He gave her a weak grin.

"No, really."

"Dizzy. Confused. Kind of queasy," he admitted.

"Well, better than delirious, yeah?" She smiled. Her face then suddenly became stormy as she spat, "You pathetic waste of a life. Arrogant and selfish bastard. Filthy cheap whore."

Jack shrank back into the bed, feeling inordinately hurt by her words. "What?"

"What?" asked Gwen innocently.

"What?" Toshiko inquired.

"She—you—just called me a whore. Among other mean things."

"No I didn't; what are you talking about?"

Tosh look puzzled. "She didn't call you anything like that, Jack. She just said something about your current state being better than delirium."

"Yeah, and then you said…." He stopped. The two women were looking at him with concern.

"Why don't we get you something to eat?" Tosh said. "You must be hungry now."

"I…yeah, I am. Starving."

"I'll go," volunteered Gwen. "I was going to go get a coffee anyway."

"Thank you, Ms. Cooper. Oh, by the way, a little secret. The receptionist, the one in the nice suit and pink shirt, just down the hall, he makes a brilliant coffee. Just tell him Tosh told you to ask."

"Oh, all right. Lovely. I'll be back in a bit then."

The room was quiet except for the hum of medical machines and Tosh adjusting Jack's IV.

Jack found his thoughts drifting. There was something in his head that was missing, and he didn't know what. There was no real gap in his memories, time-wise, but he knew something was off. "What is missing?" he muttered.

"Meaning in life?"

"What?"

Tosh was glaring at him. "Taking up my time. I could be helping people of worth, but instead I'm watching the delusional gay sailor."

"I'm pansexu—"

"I don't really care. You're a slut. You think so highly of yourself, carving notches in your headboard, believing the world is actually better with you in it. You think you're doing good, but you're just pleasing yourself. No one needs you, Harkness. The world doesn't care either way."

Jack found himself shying away from her. "Why?" he whispered.

"Why what?"

"Why are you saying…what you're saying?"

"I haven't said anything."

"But you did, you said the world doesn't need me, you said I…."

"Jack," she said, worry in her voice.

"You don't remember that at all, do you?"

"I haven't said a word since Gwen left the room. You're still ill, you know. Are you feeling dizzy?"

"Not really, just…no. I'm not dizzy." _Hurt. I feel hurt._

"Drink some water," she urged. "You might just be dozing off and dreaming, or…well, I'm not sure, but you were quite sick for days, so it could be aftereffects, though I'll admit it's odd. I'll discuss it with the doctor when he comes back. You let me know if it happens again."

"I will," he said, sighing.

* * *

"Jack. Jack! Can you hear me? Can you even see me?" Gwen demanded. She stood in the Hub's autopsy bay with Toshiko and Owen, where Jack Harkness sat on the table.

"Hold on, let me scan his brain patterns." Owen held a small metal device near Jack's head and watched the readout as it gathered information.

"And…do I know any of you?" he asked, confused.

"What in bloody hell? Jack, you loon, it's us. Gwen, Owen, Tosh," Gwen said. She looked suspiciously at Jack's eyes, which were glazed over.

"I…um…I'm sorry?" Jack looked penitent but utterly clueless.

"You can't have forgotten us already, Jack. Torchwood, remember? We fight aliens? We're a team?"

Tosh said, "It's like he can't even really see us. Look, he looks in your direction, but he's not looking at you at all."

"This is weird," Owen said. "His brain patterns are…not typical. Like...highly evolved or something. Which isn't surprising, except that last time I scanned him, they didn't look like this at all. I've no clue what it means. I just wish this damn thing came with an owner's manual," he said, gesturing to the small metal alien brain scanner. "Could use a—"

"I know who I am," Jack interrupted. "I haven't forgotten that."

"Who are you talking to?" asked Tosh.

"I'm Jack Harkness. I…I live…in Cardiff. No, I remember that now. I live in Cardiff and I work at…a boatyard. In Penarth. I'm a rigger. I moved here from America. I'm…tall and good looking." He grinned.

"Well," remarked Gwen, "he's not completely bats, anyway. Still got his ego, yeah?"

"Christopher. 'Til he dumped me and left. See, I remember. I remember you, too." He looked at Gwen. "I—" He swayed. Owen caught him and prevented him from falling. "And Rhys. And…and…."

"Who the hell is Christopher?" asked Owen.

"And…I don't know. It's like I'm missing something but I don't know what. I don't even know in relation to what."

"I'm calling Ianto. I don't know what's wrong with Jack but Teaboy will want to know. Fine day for him to be off. I need some bloody coffee." Owen started to leave.

"Coffee's the only reason to call Ianto?" Tosh said irritably.

"Lighten up, I was just kidding." Owen left the medical bay of the Hub and went to his desk to call Ianto.

Tosh sighed heavily. "I just want him to be nice to Ianto. It's not even that much to ask."

"Ah, well, that's Owen, isn't it? It's how he expresses his affection," Gwen said.

"Great," Jack said to Gwen, but he didn't look like he meant it.

"It's like he's talking to me, but not quite."

"Dizzy. Confused. Kind of queasy," he added.

"I just wish I could hear the other half of the conversation he's having in his head," she said.

Jack shrank away from Gwen, looking upset. "What?"

"What?" asked Gwen.

"What?" Toshiko inquired.

"She—you—just called me a whore. Among other mean things."

"He's completely daft. What if Owen can't fix it?"

Tosh looked thoughtful. "There is the other doctor."

"Yeah, and then you said…." Jack said awkwardly.

Tosh continued, ignoring him, "I think we should try and contact Jack's doctor."

"I…yeah, I am. Starving." Jack's characteristic grin tentatively found its way back onto his face.

"Maybe we shouldn't wait to contact him." Gwen stood up. "Could you watch him for a few minutes?"

"Of course, but what are you going to do?"

"I'm not sure yet, but I'm not going to wait to do it." She walked toward Jack's office, leaving Tosh with Jack.

"What is missing?" he muttered.

"Your mind, I think," replied Tosh.

"What?"

"Don't worry. We'll fix it."

"I'm pansexu—" He stopped as if someone had cut him off, but Tosh was silent. After a few moments of quiet, Jack backed away from Tosh, whispering "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why are you saying…what you're saying?"

"I haven't said anything."

"But you did, you said the world doesn't need me, you said I…."

"Wake up, Jack, you're in a dream!" she cried.

"You don't remember that at all, do you?"

"Remember what? Are you even talking to me?"

"Not really, just…no. I'm not dizzy." Jack looked down, unable to meet her eyes.

"It's okay, Captain, we'll make you better, somehow. We will."

"I will," he said and sighed heavily.

o-o-o-o

Owen sat on his desk and called Ianto on his mobile.

"You had better have a good reason for calling me, Owen. I'm finally catching up on sleep—"

"Look, Ianto, you need to get here now."

"Why?"

"Because…because Jack has gone bats and I can't figure out why. He's…like, he's talking to us, but not really. It's…I can't explain. Just get your arse over here now."

"No one costs me as much sleep as that man," Ianto grumbled, but Owen could hear the worry in his voice.

"Please tell me more about your sex life," Owen retorted, and hung up.

* * *

Jack jolted awake. Had he been sleeping? It seemed only a moment ago that Nurse Sato had asked him about his apparent hallucinations. It was night, though, and the clock had moved forward six hours. Dr. Harper was back, and Toshiko had apparently left.

"How are you feeling, Mr. Harkness?"

"Fine," Jack answered.

"Nurse Sato tells me you've been having visual and auditory hallucinations."

"Apparently."

"Just what I need. Harkness the slut wasting even more time. More deserving people than you could use this bed. People that think with their heads and not with their dicks, you perv. Why don't you just go? I don't care if you survive or not."

"Will everyone just shut up about my sex life!" Jack burst out.

Owen raised an eyebrow.

"Damn." Jack rolled his eyes. "This is the part where you say, 'What? I haven't said anything.' Then I say, 'Actually, you just called me a slut and told me you don't care if I live or not,' and then you say, 'No, I didn't; this must be what Tosh was talking about.' Right?"

* * *

Owen listened to Jack's outburst in wonder as he checked Jack's vitals and reexamined the brain scans. "Do you hate yourself that much, Jack? Or are you just completely bonkers?"

"I just don't understand why everyone is so repressed. Like my sex life is an insult."

"Yeah well, we'll just have to get Teaboy, won't we."

"But it feels so real!" Jack protested. "Not like hallucinating at all."

o-o-o-o

"Any word, Gwen?" inquired Toshiko.

"I called Martha Jones. She said she'd try to contact the Doctor but she couldn't promise me anything." She looked up at Myfanwy, who was flying in circles around the water tower. "I just wish I knew what was going on. D'you think it's alien tech? Maybe an accident?"

"I've scanned for weird energy signatures, but I've got nothing. I suppose one of the more recent Rift droppings could be emitting an untraceable energy or something, but honestly I don't know. That's what's so frustrating!"

"What if it's not an accident?" Gwen looked serious.

"You think someone's intentionally screwing with Jack?"

"Well, if aliens wanted to invade Earth, a smart move would be to cripple Torchwood 3. And it's not like Jack is completely unheard of. He's traveled with the Doctor a bit."

"Oh! And they can't just kill him!"

Gwen stood. "I'm going back to the medical bay." She headed toward the autopsy area. Tosh followed.

* * *

Last night had been something of a blur. Jack vaguely remembered eating dinner and sleeping, but he couldn't remember specifics. The doctor came in and called him names as he removed the IV. Jack decided not to mention it. The sooner he got out of this hospital, the better. He wasn't going to risk extending his stay by telling the staff about his apparent delusions. While Harper checked the monitors, Gwen paid a visit.

"Jack, you no good son of a bitch. Who have you gotten killed today?"

Confused and hurt, Jack looked down, trying to pretend he couldn't hear her. The frequency of the delusions was increasing, and while he knew they weren't real, they certainly felt real. He couldn't ignore them easily, either. They cut.

"I'm talking to you, skank. Not that you ever listen. Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah," he said noncommittally.

Tosh returned as well. "Still missing something, Jack? Is it self-respect?"

"What?" he asked, trying to sound calm.

"I asked if you wanted to take a bit of a walk, you stupid boy."

Getting out of the room sounded wonderful. "Yes, please."

Tosh and Gwen supported Jack as he got out of the hospital bed. His legs felt a bit wobbly, but he was determined to take this walk. "I'm all right, really." He still held onto Tosh just in case as they left the hospital room.

More fluorescent lights and white walls. Ah well. Jack hadn't expected the hall to be much different from his room. As they neared the end of the hall, his head buzzed oddly. _Still missing something_, he thought.

"Gwen, how is he?" a polite Welsh voice asked.

"Oh, lovely, darling."

Jack looked around to see who was talking—and froze. Although he was still extremely confused, he knew what he had been missing. It was this man—although he wasn't sure who the man was nor how he knew him—who filled a strange empty spot Jack couldn't explain.

"Jack, what's wrong?" The Welshman rushed toward him from behind the reception desk and seized his wrists.

Jack gasped. "How do you know my name?"

"I don't suppose now is the time to tell you that you've made me scream it on more than one occasion?" he whispered softly into Jack's ear.

Jack drew his head away. Looking distressed, he said, "I know you. I know…you're the missing piece. But I don't know your name. Why don't I know your name?"

"Ianto. My name's Ianto." He released Jack's wrists.

"Ianto," he whispered. "Don't. Please."

"Don't what?"

"Don't let go of me."

Ianto was disturbed to notice that Jack looked genuinely frightened.

"Oh don't encourage the bastard," Gwen spat.

"I wouldn't touch him if I were you, Ianto. The freak might infect you with about 100 STIs." Tosh's voice was full of venom. "He's a predator, and you're just a cute little rabbit he spotted."

* * *

"Don't let go of me."

"Oi, he can understand you," Gwen said, shocked.

"Maybe that means he can understand us now," said Tosh, excited. "Ianto, he could usually tell which of us was talking, but he kept talking like we were saying completely different things. But he's not doing that to you. Why not?"

"No!" Jack protested. "I'm not like that!"

"I know," Ianto soothed as he drew Jack into his arms. "Guess not," he said to Tosh.

"Guess not what?"

Ianto wasn't sure how to respond to the near-hysterical Jack, but the man continued before he had a chance to talk.

"Please help me," he whispered. "I think I'm losing my mind."

Jack's pleading eyes met Ianto's, and the younger man took the captain's face in his hands. "Jack, calm down."

And strangely, Jack did feel calm. The medical staff and his flatmate were being cruel to him, but this stranger believed him, and he was a beautiful anchor to have.


	2. Chapter 2

**So...I have to apologize for this taking so long. My laptop has been on the fritz, and I just took vacations and moved to a different state and all sorts of exciting things. Hopefully the next chapters won't take so long to publish.**

**I don't own the rights to these characters.**

* * *

"Listen."

Jack was listening. Ianto was the only person who wasn't cursing his existence, so Jack was most certainly listening.

Besides, the man was hot.

"Your name is Jack Harkness."

"Yeah, I know that part."

"You live in Cardiff in the twenty-first century."

"Got that too," replied Jack.

"You work for…." He stopped.

Jack looked at him hopefully. "Davies' Boatyard, right?"

Ianto stared at him for a moment. "Yes," he finally responded.

"But—" began Tosh.

Ianto cut her off with a wave of his hand. "Jack, can I trust you to stay right here for just a few minutes? I'll be back, I promise."

Jack nodded reluctantly and watched as Ianto ordered his flatmate, nurse, and doctor into an office.

* * *

"Alright, Teaboy, out with it."

Tosh raised her foot to kick Owen, remembered he couldn't heal, and lowered it.

"Why are you letting him think he's a bloody sailor?" Owen sat slumped in a chair, looking up at the taller man.

"Because, O King of the Weevils, Jack is not to be told a thing about Torchwood until we know what the hell is going on with him."

Gwen nodded slowly. "You think someone's inside his brain?"

"I don't know. And frankly we don't know what Jack is capable of," Ianto said.

"We don't. You do."

Ianto ignored Owen. There was no point rising. His cynicism and moodiness had gotten considerably worse since his death, which seemed reasonable to Ianto. "He does seem to have, ah…advanced mental capabilities. He was born three thousand years in the future, wasn't he? That and he's two hundred years old. Or-or thereabouts."

"So you think he did this to himself?" Tosh asked.

"My main theory says yes."

"Why?" Gwen glanced toward the window through which they could see Jack nervously looking around.

"Think about it. I can think of three main possibilities. One, he's being manipulated into believing in a world that isn't real by aliens. Two, he did this to himself. Three, he's lost it. I think we can probably eliminate three."

"Yeah, I'm not sure we should," Owen cut in. "Look, I may be dead, but I am a doctor, and I have seen patients lose their grip on reality permanently from some traumas. And Jack has definitely been through more than anyone I've ever met. He's not only a medical miracle, but a psychiatric one as well."

"But he was completely normal last night. And this morning, come to think of it. What did happen, will someone tell me?"

Tosh spoke up. "He came in the Hub at eight, and he said he felt dizzy. I led him to the medical bay, and then he fainted. He was out for about half an hour. When he came to…this." She gestured at Jack.

"Last night must have been the last straw for him," Owen said. "Did you bite too hard?"

Gwen was impressed by Ianto's restraint, but she didn't have the time to tell him so. "So why do you think he did this to himself? Why not aliens?"

Ianto shook his head. "I think it is aliens. And I also think he did this to himself."

"Go on," Tosh said.

"Well…this is all speculative, but if someone wanted to attack Earth, the best source of information they could get would be Jack Harkness, yeah? So maybe someone's trying to get in his head, and this is how he's blocking them. Sort of a liar's palace, only more realistic."

"What's a liar's palace?" asked Gwen.

"It's what spies use, or really smart kids, or anyone trying to fool a lie detector. You build a fake persona, connect your characteristics and memories a certain way, like you would if the character were real. Then all you have to do is go to your palace and pull out your character," Tosh answered.

"Okay," said Owen. "Okay, but what if it's just aliens trying to get him out of the way? Y'know, since he can't be killed."

"I thought about that too. But…I'm real to him. Which doesn't seem likely if aliens created this world for him. Whereas if he made it, then he'd want a link to reality. Someone he trusted."

"Teaboy," Owen muttered.

Ianto smiled thinly, the expression not reaching his eyes. "So don't talk to him about Torchwood. In fact, don't talk to him at all."

Owen glared. "Who died and put you in charge?"

Gwen crossed her arms. "Ianto's right. No one talks to Jack except Ianto. He doesn't like it when we do."

"That's another thing, though," Tosh put in. "Why does he think we're saying awful things to him? That's not a world anyone would intentionally create for themselves."

"The aliens are trying to get past his defenses, maybe?" offered Gwen.

"I don't know," Ianto said, trying and failing to maintain a professional tone. "Maybe Owen's right and aliens are just fucking with him. Maybe he's finally snapped. I don't _know_. But until we do know, can we try and put the least possible amount of stress on him?"

Gwen stood. "Agreed. Tosh, use the Torchwood satellites, scan for nearby activity, odd transmissions, you know. Owen, use the brain scans you took from Jack and see if you can find similar MRI results somewhere. Mental hospitals, psych wards, old UNIT and Torchwood infirmaries, anything you think of. Ianto…"

"I'm taking him home. If you need any more scans, do them now."

Gwen nodded. "And I'll be making a few calls. I've got my mobile and headset if you need me."

"Understood." He turned to Tosh and Owen. "Need anything?"

Toshiko shook her head, but Owen said, "Yeah, assurance that some teaboy won't traumatize my patient again while he's unfit for duty."

"Stop it," Tosh said angrily.

"If that's all, then." Ianto turned sharply and left the office.

* * *

Jack was sitting against the cinderblock wall, hugging his knees to his chest. Orderlies and doctors walked past, some of them very nice eye candy, but Jack's sweet tooth was hiding in the back of his mind. He closed his eyes and tried to think happy thoughts, but dark ones kept intruding. Just when he was beginning to wonder if Ianto had even been real in the first place, he felt a warm body slide down the wall next to him.

"Hey," Ianto said softly.

"Hey," Jack answered, smiling weakly.

"Can you stand?"

"Yeah, I was just waiting."

Ianto pulled Jack to his feet. "We're going home."

* * *

"I thought I wasn't supposed to leave the hospital."

"I promised the doctor I would take care of you. You don't really need to stay at the hospital."

"I don't have a key," he mumbled. "Is Rhys home?"

"We're going to my flat," Ianto explained. "You spend almost every night there anyway."

"I do?"

Ianto's stomach clenched. "Yes."

"Are you my boyfriend?"

"Yes." Maybe. No point explaining that the implied terms of their relationship did not necessarily include fidelity (although as far as Ianto knew, Jack hadn't slept with anyone since the first night Ianto had pinned him against a wall and made his desires known), official boyfriend status (the word got thrown around anyway), or love. Affection, fondness, passion, want, need, yes. Love…maybe. Ianto knew his own feelings. He also expected that they would never fully be reciprocated. Jack was too different, too old to truly love someone as young and as fragile as Ianto. Too smart, too. Torchwood members always died young—_Lisa_—and even if they didn't, even if he lived to be a hundred, how could an ageless man who can't die open his heart over and over, knowing he'd outlive all of his lovers?

"Good."

Ianto relaxed slightly. He unlocked his car and ushered Jack into the passenger seat before getting in himself.

"I just wish I could remember you."

"Can you trust me?" Ianto asked, starting the car.

"I don't know what else I can do. You're the only one who doesn't seem to hate me. But nothing is making much sense. Why didn't Gwen know who you were if you're my boyfriend?"

Ianto winced as he pulled out of the car park. "Er. Well. The thing is, Jack, you've been…tripping, for want of a better word. People aren't actually saying things you seem to think they're saying. Except me. Don't know why."

"And they let me out of the hospital?"

"You're too sharp. That makes this hard."

"Stop the car," Jack said sharply.

Ianto obeyed, pulling over to a parking place on the shoulder. "What?"

"I don't know who you are or why I can't remember you. I don't know why you're the only person I feel like I can trust right now. But this is all very fishy, and I just want you to know that if you try to hurt me or Gwen or Rhys, I am very capable of defending myself."

"I know you are."

"I won't let anyone hurt my friends."

"I know."

"Now. Explain what you meant when you said 'That makes this hard'. Right away, please."

Ianto felt caught. He might have to tell Jack a half truth instead of a whole lie. "You were never in hospital," he finally said.

"What do you mean, never in hospital? We're driving away from it right now!"

"No, we're not. We're going to my place from Gwen and Rhys's place. You've been sick, and Gwen and Rhys can't be with you. I have to take you to my house. I mean, I want to. But you never went to the hospital. You've been delirious, and now you're hallucinating. It's all right, though. We'll get you better."

"You keep saying that. I don't even know you." Jack glared suspiciously at Ianto.

Ianto closed his eyes, trying to gather patience and calm his frightened heart. "Yes, Jack, you do know me," he said softly, calmly. "You've shared your bed with me for over a year now. You share a lot with me. Sometimes we even go on dates, although I admit I'm a bit shy about holding hands in public." He took Jack's hand now. "I have your name tattooed on my arse."

Jack's eyes widened. "Really?"

"No."

"Oh thank god. That…sounds in really bad taste."

"Maybe when I'm old and don't care anymore."

"How old are you? Actually, how old am I?"

"175? 200? I don't know. Is it alright if I drive us to my flat now?"

"Oh all right then. I must've aged fantastically. Lots of people don't look this gorgeous in their best years." He flashed a trademark grin, playing along with what he believed to be a joke.

"Mmm." Ianto made a noncommittal noise and hid a smile. He wasn't sure why Jack's vanity was so endearing, but it did amuse him to know that even three thousand years in humanity's future, people were still obsessed with appearances. Which, he realized, was pretty rich coming from a guy who took extra pains to look snappy and nice every day. Still, it said a lot about humans.

"You're not one of 'em, though. You're unfairly beautiful. Your whole face…the way your cheekbones…oh god, and you've got blue eyes. Of course I've been involved with you. You're much too lovely to ignore."

Ianto knew he shouldn't pay attention to anything Jack said: he was stuck in his own world and didn't know what he was talking about. He couldn't help enjoying the compliments though. "It's true; you harassed me from the moment we became friends."

"You make it sound like you didn't want it."

"Well, it was highly inappropriate. I was working for you."

"At Davies'?"

"Yeah."

Jack suddenly became paranoid again. "If you're lying, I'll find out. And if you're taking me home to tie me up—"

"You like that."

Jack didn't reply, and Ianto glanced sideways at him, feeling very guilty as he realized that Jack was scared.

"Hey," he said, offering Jack a reassuring pat on the arm. "We'll get through this together. I'm here for you."

Several minutes passed in silence. Ianto normally would have enjoyed the quiet. One of the reasons he and Jack were good company for each other was that they both could share quiet moments without trying to fill them with nonsense. This time, however, Ianto felt the need to keep Jack's mind from wandering too far away.

"So," he said, trying to sound jovial, "who's Christopher?"

"Hmm? Oh, Chris. My ex. Tall, nice eyes. Big ears. Stupid hair. More exhausting to be around than I am, if you can believe that. Can't believe I haven't mentioned him before. Dumped me for a blonde girl and then disappeared."

Ianto tried not to laugh at the character. He knew exactly whom Jack meant. _Ex?_ he thought. _That never happened. __Oh my god, did that happen? Were they sleeping together_? "What does he do for a living?"

"Physics professor."

"Ph. D.?"

"How'd you know?"

"Just a guess." _Where did he get the name Chris? I thought it was John Smith_.

"I think he liked his degree too much. He wanted to be called 'Doctor' in the sack."

_Well, at least he's got something he always wanted in his delusion. __Unless that is real. Now I'm curious._ "And did you?"

"Well, yeah. I'll indulge anyone once. Well, nothing that isn't sapient, and nothing dead. Other than that…." He looked sideways at Ianto. "But you'd know that, wouldn't you?"

"Think I'd figured it out, yeah." He pulled into the lot outside the complex. "We may run into people on the way to my flat. Try to ignore them if you don't like what they're saying." He parked and helped Jack out of the car.

* * *

Ianto's apartment complex was relatively small, but Jack couldn't help feeling uncomfortable as they walked through the doors. He didn't want to talk to anyone but Ianto. As luck would have it, a middle-aged man spotted them right away and immediately made a beeline for the pair.

"This your rent-boy, Ianto? Bit old, isn't he?"

"Hey now," said Jack. "I've got a lot of life left in me." He turned to Ianto. "Am I still hallu—did he really say—"

"Sometimes you don't have to imagine people are cruel," Ianto whispered. "Sometimes they just are."

The man wasn't finished. "Oh, no, I see. Civil servant, isn't that what you do, Ianto? Such a nice phrase. Is that what your nickname is on the website?"

"Should I just seduce him and get it over with?"

"No," said Ianto, sighing. "I think Mr. Davis here is just mean. They're not all in the closet, you know, Jack. Come on, I'm not wasting time here."

As they walked away, Jack asked, "I heard all that right? About me being a rent-boy, and you being a rent-boy?"

"Yup. He's an arse. Thinks I'm gay because I dress neatly."

"By the way, no offense, actually you shouldn't be offended, this is a compliment, I mean, you could definitely sell yourself online. I think I am a little old. Handsome and dashing, but mature. Fine wine. Not rent-boy material." He stopped, suddenly taking note of Ianto's last comment. "Wait, aren't you?"

"Aren't I what?"

"Gay."

"Not exactly. That's not the point. This is the first time he's ever seen me with you, and you're my first boyfriend. He's using stereotypes to navigate the world. It's stupid, and he's an arsehole."

"Hey, Ianto." A young woman smiled at the pair in the hallway. "I see you picked up something for the night."

"Yup," Ianto agreed. His eyes flicked over to Jack. "Em, sort of. Basically. Yes."

"I can find you nicer boys online, you know. Younger ones. That one has got to be ten years older than you at least. Bit pervy, if you ask me."

"We usually get in a bit later."

"I never pegged you as the type to date military men. That one's a fake, anyway. Full of shit."

"I'm not, why does everyone think that? I could be bi, or omni, or…it's all a continuum, anyway. But no, I'm expected to pick one." Ianto rolled his eyes. "Anyway, it's nice to see you, but Jack and I are in a bit of a hurry."

"Ooh, sounds exciting. Call me if you need a third," she said, grinning, and blew a kiss at the couple as they parted ways.

"You all right, Jack?"

"Not especially."

"She didn't say anything bad."

"I know. I'm just broken."

"No, no, no. You're not broken. Just sick. She asked if you were my boyfriend, and then she asked why she hadn't seen you before."

"Why hasn't she?"

"Because we work late and get in late. And then she mentioned that she was surprised to see me with a military man, and that she didn't know I was gay. And I said I wasn't."

"Do I always date men in denial?"

"I am not talking about this right now. Then she said to call her if we needed a third."

"I heard that part." Jack looked interested. "Maybe if she stops calling me old and pervy."

"She didn't. She thinks you're hot. Come on." They reached the door of the flat, and Ianto unlocked it. He ushered Jack into the living room and helped him take his greatcoat off. "Sofa?" he suggested, indicating the furniture.

Jack reluctantly let go of Ianto in order to find a seat on the couch. As he stood in front of the sofa, feeling puzzled, he watched the world begin to spin. Ianto's voice came from afar.

"Jack? What's wrong?" The voice echoed, bouncing around Jack's skull.

"Spinning," he managed to answer as the floor rushed upwards to greet him.


End file.
